tomorrow is the big day!

Last belly picture, taken the night before delivery.


Thank you to the faithful readers who have kept up with this blog through the end! I love your comments and thank you for letting me vent last week. I needed it.
We are ready for Little Kev. It is funny to walk down the hallway of our three bedroom house and think that 2 1/2 years ago the two rooms on the right were filled with "stuff". By "stuff" I mean boxes from the move in, my computer, random wedding stuff that didn't get thrown out, wedding presents that were waiting to be opened until we had a real kitchen, and a whole lot of dust bunnies! Now I look in there and I see two little kid rooms. Mia's room is so cute. Aunt Barb made her the sweetest curtains and she sits and plays in there with her toys. She loves to go over to her dresser and pull out all of her clothes and throw them around the room. She has a basket of stuffed dolls and animals. Kev and I can watch her from our room, and she takes each animal out, talks to it, and hugs it and rubs it and then sets it next to the basket. It is really cute! Then next to her room is Baby Kev's. His is a tan and green room with his crib and dresser and a few toys. Big Kev really did an amazing job on both rooms. He makes Bob Vila look like an amateur. He painted the walls, made all the wainscotting, installed the hardwood floors, and made all the molding from knotty pine boards. Both rooms are beautiful.
Our house is really complete. When I was having so much trouble staying pregnant, I prayed so hard for one baby. I promised that I would never take for granted the one I had and I would never ask for another thing again. All I wanted was to have one. Now here I sit on the eve of having two. My life is complete. I don't "want" for anything. I love my husband, my kids, my house, my dog, our cars, my family and friends. If there was a contest for a content life, I would enter myself, because I really feel like I have it all. Every day I feel content and that is all I could wish for anyone. It is truly an amazing feeling. I enjoy every aspect of my life and I hope and pray that everyone can someday feel this contentment.
Until I have time to write again...

35 weeks

At this point, I am so happy to still be pregnant. If I should go into labor for any reason, I probably won't have to go back to WMC! I am so thrilled with that. Even if Junior had any type of trouble, he would be taken to St. Luke's in Newburgh which is so much closer than Westchester.
I had an appointment yesterday. Everything looks good, no signs of pre-eclampsia. My weight gain is good, about 28 pounds to this point. The doctor thinks the baby is about 5 to 5 1/2 pounds, which for the mother fo a preemie, is huge! He thinks the baby will be between 6 1/2 and 7 1/2 pounds at birth. I am really feeling crowded inside. I am not sure how much more he can grow in there. I am not complaining though. I know how hard it was to stay pregnant to this point and each day is a blessing. When I was watching Mia in the NICU for 6 weeks, I swore a vow to myself that I would never complain about the end of pregnancy because the physical discomfort that I would feel is nothing compared to the pain of seeing her little body hooked up to machines and tubes and wires and not being able to hold her or feed her.
My c-section is scheduled for 4 weeks from today. It is hard to believe how fast that is going to come up. I am not wishing it to go faster because this is the last few weeks we have to devote solely to Mia. We are doing a lot with her and cherishing every moment. She is such a cute little ham! She loves to play on her swing set and play with Hank. We are excited to see how she acts this Halloween since she is old enough to enjoy it! I will have many pictures out!
Here's to praying for another week...

34 weeks!

I can't believe it. I never thought I would make it to this day. My worries are fading with each passing day! I feel really good and everyone at work tells me I look really good. My c-section is scheduled for 5 weeks from today! Keep the prayers coming...

33 weeks

Baby Pierce week!
I told you earlier that every week is marked by a milestone of a baby's birth! This is the week that my cousin Becky delivered my cousin William Pierce! He was 3 pounds 10 ounces at birth and only had to spend 2 weeks in the NICU! The thought of that makes me so happy! Each week is a week closer to normalcy. Little Pierce is doing so well and is so cute and happy. Pierce was able to start drinking half of his feedings from a bottle right away and had no apnea or need for oxygen. This makes me very happy and positive.
I took Mia on Tuesday to visit her neonatologist to check on her development and he wished me a "normal" delivery. I told him that is all we hope for. I can deal with pain for myself, I just can't take seeing my baby in any type of pain.
Mia is developing normally and is hitting all of her milestones as expected. She is 29 inches and 20 pounds. She is a petite little thing but so perfect. At 14 months she is wearing 12 month clothes! (though she is ready to move into 18 months very soon).
I also have to take this moment to brag about my wonderful Kevin. Since I went back to work he has taken over almost all of the house-hold chores. I leave for work at 7:30 to drop Mia off and by the time I pick her up and get home it is 5:00. My Kevin has the laundry going, dinner made, the bottles washed, the dishwasher loaded or unloaded and the sink empty. He is so wonderful. And to see him with Mia makes me confident that he is not only my best friend but the best father I could ever hope to have for my children. He is so excited about little Kev too! It is hard to believe that I am being delivered 6 weeks from today! I can't wait!

32 weeks 4 days!

And still no signs of pre-eclampsia. I feel wonderful and everyone tells me I look wonderful! I am being delivered 6 weeks from this Thursday on November 15.
I went to my class reunion last night and danced the night away with old friends and felt good about myself! I had worried that I would look huge and pregnant and maybe shouldn't go. Not the case, I felt good and thought I looked good and a great time was had by all! (okay, maybe not Kevin who would have rather been home in bed but he was a great sport and attended every function over the weekend without a complaint!)
Life is good...

31 weeks 3 days

And no signs of pre-eclampsia! I feel good at this point that if he was born, I know what to expect! Prior to now was touch and go but from now on I can handle it!
And the d-day is ... November 15! So the prayers are now directed toward that day!

31 weeks!

Today is the day that I began my hospital stay before delivering Mia. I was 31 weeks exactly and then she was delivered at 31 weeks and 3 days. This Sunday will be the longest that I have ever been pregnant (and this is my fourth pregnancy). I also developed the pre-eclampsia between weeks 29 and 31.
I am proud to say that my blood pressure is fine, I have no swelling and no protein in my urine. I go back to the doctor tomorrow and they should schedule my c-section. I will post again this weekend to let you know our son's birthday! I am referring to it as "d-day" (delivery day)!

29 weeks

Well I am 29 weeks pregnant, back to work, and surviving. I must say going back to work wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. I feel great physically and seem to have a nice class. I have 25 3rd graders, which includes 5 classified special ed. children because I am an "inclusion" classroom. Emotionally, leaving Mia has been terrible. I know that I have it easier than a lot of women because I leave Mia with Meg, but it is still hard to be away from her. I watch the clock and think about what we would be doing if I were home with her. I miss her terribly. I have wallpapered the walls with her pictures and that helps. Plus, I have some really great friends there and that helps too.
So far, I have gained about 20 pounds which is perfect for 29 weeks. I look like I am carrying a basketball in the front. Very stereotypical for a boy but it seems to be true. At work they tease me and say that from the back I don't look pregnant. I have no stretch marks so far and am hoping to keep them away again!
Little Kev is a mover and shaker and we can watch him doing flips at night. I am very excited for him to be born and to spend about 10 months home with him and Mia. I think Mia will be a great big sister. She is doing very well with Sophia and has only hit her a few times and she realized right away that it was wrong and then she was "nice" to her. Little Sophia just loves Mia to pieces. When we walk in to the apartment in the morning, Sophia lights up and coos and aahs at Mia. They are going to be great friends.
Again, I apologize for the lack of posts and pictures and will try to do better! Love ya if you are still reading and believe in my ability to occasionally post to this blog!

26 weeks

It is so interesting to compare this pregnancy with my pregnancy with Mia. When we got pregnant with Mia, we were almost certain that she would be another miscarriage. I never got attached to her while pregnant. I found the new sensations interesting but still remained terrified that if I sneezed too hard, I would lose her. By the middle of that pregnancy I felt really good and started to let myself get excited. Kevin still remained terrified. He thought that if I had another miscarriage, I would seriously crack up.
I still watch other pregnant women and can't help but feel jealous at their carefree attitute toward being pregnant. These women "glow" in their pregnancy and flaunt their growing bellies and want everyone to touch and show overwhelming enthusiasm at their pregnancy, while I just wanted to stay pregnant another day. It used to make me feel really resentful of the fact that they had no idea how hard it was for me to stay pregnant. They skip off to register with their significant other and focus on the materialistic end of pregnancy and rejoice in the fact that they will have a baby to show off but they will never really appreciate the miracle that has taken place inside their body. I should have enjoyed my pregnancy with Mia more because I wasn't sick and until the end felt relatively good.
Now I compare this to my pregnancy with "little Kev". This little one was a complete shock to both of us. He also made me so sick in the beginning (I think it is the foreign testosterone in my body). Now that I am at the "happy middle" stages I feel good and think that I am enjoying this pregnancy a bit more. I am not petrified of miscarriage but now have the new feeling of being petrified of having to do the NICU again. I have started watching that last few weeks not from an internal developmental point of view but from the babies I saw in the NICU that were gestationally born at this age. My first room-mate at Westchester had her baby at 24 weeks. I remember her husbands enjoyment when their son "made his first poop." Well I made it past 24 weeks, my baby should be able to poop. Then there was the baby "Isabella" who was next to Mia's isolette, who was born at 25 weeks. I would watch as her heartrate would skyrocket into the 200's and the nurses would hit her chest with their hands to "shock" it back into a normal rhythm. Thankfully I am past 25 weeks. There is also a fabulous documentary called "Little Man" about a preemie born at 25 weeks and it chronicles the daily struggle to keep these babies alive, especially if they ever go home. It is very sad that the boy Nicholas in the documentary will never lead a "normal" life. Now I am at the 26th week. There was a little boy born at the same time as Mia at 26 weeks gestation. Kevin knew his father from a basketball league that he played on when he was younger. I had to watch as the doctor told this boy's parents that he had bleeding on the brain. I do not know the outcome of this baby or of any of the babies that were there but I pray that they made it through. It is a rosy view and I can't imagine the trouble their parents had to face daily and nightly.
I don't think I can face Westchester's Level 4 NICU again. These are the worst of the worst cases. It was the best place for Mia to be born and they are amazing medically but I don't want to see it ever again. I won't even go to the "NICU reunion" there. If I never have to go back there, then I am a happy person!
The goal is for me to make it to 35 weeks. If I make it there I can deliver in Middletown at ORMC. They may have to take the baby to the NICU at St. Luke's in Newburgh but that is a Level 2 NICU and the babies there are stable and just need a little more time in the hospital. I have so much respect for Dr. KP at St. Luke's and would trust him to not only care for little Kev but Dr. KP and his nurses would show him love and compassion, something that lacks in the larger NICU. If I can make it to 37 weeks, ORMC should be able to care for little Kev.

So we now add a new countdown to my pregnancy. The goal we pray for isn't the typical 14 weeks to go. It is to make it past the next 9 weeks. Anything beyond that is an extra blessing.
New pictures coming soon!
Love to all!

23 weeks

Here is a picture! I definitely look pregnant. It is very different this time. I seem to be more belly than I was with Mia. When I was pregnant with Mia I gained weight all around, now it seems to be more in the front. We will see what happens over the next 15 or 16 weeks. It is hard to believe that in less than 4 months we will have another little one around!

22 weeks

Well we finally have some answers about my blood type! I have a rare condition called a D-antigen in my blood. Upon first blood tests, my blood will appear as O-. The blood needs to be tested twice to find out that I am actually 0+. What a relief. Even if on a first test, my blood appeared O- and they gave me O- blood, it wouldn't hurt me. It would only hurt if I was O- and they gave me O+. So Kevin and I and Mia are all O+.
As a precaution, and because I have gotten it 3 times already, they will give me the rhogam shot just to be on the safe side against the RH factor.
Other than that I am feeling pretty good. I look pregnant (pictures will come soon). I feel pregnant. This one is a mover! And this month I gained 6 pounds which brings the total to 10 pounds so far (but I was 10 pounds overweight when I started so I am 20 pounds heavier than normal).
According to my sonogram they are keeping my due date at November 22. However, they are going to schedule my c-section for a week or two before. So it is safe to say that by Thanksgiving we will have another little turkey here!
We are working on switching Mia to the new room we painted because it is brown and cream and because I love the color pink with brown. Little Kev's room will be Mia's which is tan and green. Lil' Kev will use Mia's crib and changing table and we ordered new for Mia's room. It should be here in September. I have already started to move stuff around in there for her. It is going to look so good! When it is all done I will take some pictures.
Kevin is hard at work in our main bathroom. He ripped everything out and we bought new everything. After that all we have left to do in the house is the kitchen and then everything will have been completely remodeled. The completed rooms are really not decorated but at least the walls are painted and the floors are all new (either hardwood or tile). We are happy with it so far.
Until I sit down again...

20 weeks

I knew I would have trouble keeping up with posting!
Well the halfway point has finally arrived! With that comes the news that we are having a boy. It will be the first grandson on both sides. And with that comes our Kevin Michael Mesnick Jr. My Kevin is very excited about being a senior. I think it has something to do with American Choppers but I can't be sure. Especially since he now finds the show overrated!
Healthwise we are still at a stand still. My blood type came back to my doctor's office as O+ but it doesn't make sense that 2 hospitals found it O-. This could cause a major problem with the baby possibly having O+ blood and if I am O- my body will develop anti-bodies against the baby and attack his red blood cells. Mia is O+ and had a long bout (21 days) under jaundice lights. The blood incompatibility could be the reason for that. In the worst case scenerio I will insist on the Rhogam shot at 27 weeks. It won't hurt me if I am O+ and will help if I am O-. The heart palpatations and migraines are much better. They have become very infrequent and I am thankful for that. No results still from the cardiologist. They seem to say "no news is good news" but I worry that I may have been forgotten.
I now have been having trouble with my sciatica nerve in my lower back, which is normal, and I had it with Mia. Thankfully, laying down seems to help. I also have been swimming which is a nice relief. I feel "light as a feather" in the water. Mia loves to swim too! So does Hank but the poor boy isn't allowed in the pool for fear that he will rip the liner.
After a year off I have been starting to get myself psyched up to go back to work next month. I will miss Mia terribly during the day but am very thankful Meg will watch her and take very good care of her.
I will post updated pics of my growing stomach soon! Until then...

17 weeks

I finally feel good! It is almost like I am myself again.

Is it strange that at 17 weeks I look smaller than 15 weeks? Either the bloating subsided or the baby switched positions. It should be about 4-5 inches, or the size of an onion, according to babycenter.com.

I haven't gained much weight but have had such a hard time finding foods to eat that I don't think I took in enough calories. Now that I am feeling better I am eating better. I go back to the OB on Monday and will hopefully find out the results to all the tests I have had.

After Monday's appointment we will be able to make the appointment for our ultrasound to find out what the baby is. Kevin (and all the men in my family) hope for a boy and I am hoping for another girl. We will both be thrilled with either and pray for a healthy baby. I have nicknamed this baby "little Kev" because the pregnancy is so different from Mia that I wonder if it is a boy. I will keep you posted!

week 16

This week was intersting. I felt this baby kick for the first time Friday night. I had felt fluttering before but not actual kicks. It caught me off guard because I hadn't been waiting for it. With Mia, I waited week after week until I felt the first kick. Finally, it let me know that she was okay and it was a daily reminder that I was pregnant and didn't have another miscarriage. It was also bittersweet with Mia when I developed the pre-eclampsia because the nutrients were with held from her and she stopped kicking. I knew in my heart that something was wrong and waited for any little movement and was so relieved if I felt it but it wasn't good strong kicks. This little one seems pretty strong and I hope that everything will go the way it is suppose to.
I had two appointments this week. The first one was a heart ultrasound and the second was I had to wear a holter moniter for 24 hours to moniter my heart. I have no results yet but hopefully they will be okay. I see my OB on the 18th and am anxious to hear what she has to say. The headaches were massive this past week as well. I went to the chiropractor and that seemed to help a bit so I may go a few more times and arrange for a prenatal massage.
Aside from that everything is good. Mia is growing and so cute. She says "mama, dada, baba, and hi". She also calls Hank "Ha". It is so cute to hear her little voice. She is happy as ever and such a pleasure to be around. She will be a good big sister to a boy or a girl. We will find out what it is within the next month!

15 weeks pregnant

After reading about the miracle that our Mia turned out to be, now you can see how we have been doubly blessed. People would tell me when we were trying to have a baby..."once you have one the pressure is off and they will start popping out left and right." I would answer,"I hope so." And here we are expecting another after less than a year with Mia. The two babies will be 16 months apart.

I wish I could say that this time was as easy as the first 3 months pregnant with Mia. I didn't get sick at all with Mia. This time I have had every negative symptom- nausea, food aversions, exhaustion, heart palpatations and worst of all migraine headaches. There are days where I take tylenol from morning to night to deal with the pain. Lucky for me, Mia is an angel. We cuddle together until the headaches go away and she is never fussy or demanding.

I have been seeing specialists for my heart and blood. While they think I will get pre-eclampsia again, they hope to catch it early and try to keep me pregnant as long as possible. The difficult part being that the only real cure for pre-eclampsia is delivery but they do have medicines that I could take for blood pressure if needed just to keep me pregnant a little longer. Let's hope that it doesn't come to that.

So far I have been my typical 109/60 and I pray it says that way. I have gained 4 1/2 pounds so far and am starting to get a little extra pep. Some days I feel great, others I feel awful. The headaches dictate the way the day is going to go. Hopefully this phase will pass and the rest of the pregnancy will go smoothly.

I have an appt. on June 6 for a heart ultrasound and to have a holter moniter put on to moniter my heart for a 24 hour period. I will let you know that goes. Until then...

Mia's birth story

Prior to getting pregnant with Mia I had 2 miscarriages. Getting pregnant wasn't hard for me but staying pregnant was. When I got pregnant with Mia we prayed that 3rd time was a charm, and it was. I stayed off my feet for the first 12 weeks of pregnancy. Which was difficult because I am an avid gym devotee! After that I was told to be super cautious and careful. I had a wonderful pregnancy. I ate all fresh fruit and vegetables and drank my skim milk and took my prenatal vitamins. I did everything according to the experts. I was never sick or tired. My skin was glowing and I felt great. I gained a perfect amount of weight, 17 pounds in 30 weeks.
Then all of a sudden everything went down hill.

During week 30 my body swelled. I couldn't move my arms. I slept with my wrists in braces to help with the pain. I didn't recognize my own face in the mirror. I was gaining 4-5 pounds of water weight a night. I gained 20 pounds in a week. I attributed it to being July and what everyone told me pregnancy was like in the summer. I waited to go to the Dr. until my next scheduled OB appt. When I got there we found out that my kidneys had shut down and my blood pressure sky rocketed. It was 170/110. My normal is 110/70. I had developed a very dangerous condition called pre-eclampsia. The biggest risk of this condition is that I could have had a stroke. And based on how serious my condition had become, they thought I would stroke at any minute. I was sent from the Dr. office to Orange Regional Medical Center. I stayed there a night and was sent to Westchester Medical Center the next day. They kept me on bedrest another day so that I could have 2 steroid shots to jump start Mia's lungs. They knew that they would be underdeveloped. But the only way to save my life and hers was immediate delivery.

Then on Friday July 28, 2006 at 10:31 a.m. Mia Grace was delivered by C-section. She was gestationally 31 weeks 3 days. She weighed 2 pounds 8 ounces and was 15 inches long. She stayed in the NICU at WMC for 13 days and was transferred to the NICU at St. Luke's in Newburgh and stayed there for 4 more weeks.

Nothing can prepare you for the pain you feel leaving your child behind. It is not natural. I went to see her everyday. I sat with her from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. every day. Some days I got there earlier and some I stayed later. I couldn't hold her a lot so I sat and watched her in her incubator. I would open the port holes and sing to her or read to her. I let her know right away that she had a mommy and that I wouldn't leave her.

Some days they would let me hold her for a few minutes some days for an hour. Those were the moments I lived for.

Finally after 6 weeks we were able to bring her home. When she came home she was exactly 4 pounds.

Now, she is doing wonderfully. She is the happiest baby I have ever seen and we love her to pieces. She sleeps all night and smiles all day. She is never fussy or grumpy. She is pure sunshine. Motherhood is all that I imagined and more. And that is my Mia's entrance to the world!

And here is a picture of my happy girl at 10 months old!